


Fears

by nocturnaofspace



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Blow Jobs, Dirk Gently is a noodle, Dom/sub Undertones, Falling Out of Bed, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pararibulitis (Dirk Gently), Pararibulitis attack, Sleeping in the same bed, mild panic attack, reassurance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-19
Packaged: 2018-12-27 11:01:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12079749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nocturnaofspace/pseuds/nocturnaofspace
Summary: "“What?! Who?! Where?!” The englishman bolted upright out of bed, his normally impeccable brown hair spiked and mussed all around. It seriously looked like Dirk Gently had had epic sex last night, but Todd knew better. Dirk was a fitful sleeper, which is why he had woken Todd up in the middle of the night."





	1. Chapter 1

“Dirk…”

*snore* 

“Dirk!” 

“What?! Who?! Where?!” The englishman bolted upright out of bed, his normally impeccable brown hair spiked and mussed all around. It seriously looked like Dirk Gently had had epic sex last night, but Todd knew better. Dirk was a fitful sleeper, which is why he had woken Todd up in the middle of the night. 

“How many times do I need to tell you to get out of my bed!” Todd rubbed his eyes sleepily. “You have the couch.” 

“But I don’t like the couch and you’re warm….” Dirk whined, he started to sink back into the lumpy and in no way comfortable mattress. 

“Oh no you don’t!” Todd landed a sharp kick on Dirk’s backside. What followed was, well, Dirk falling off the bed, but it was more than that. He was so skinny, all arms and legs. It was like watching a spaghetti noodle fall off a plate. Todd laughed. 

“No!” Dirk retorted sharply. “You don’t get to kick me out of your bed and then laugh.” He sat up and brought his knees up to his chin, looking at his toes. “My toes are cold…” 

Todd rolled his eyes and flopped back onto the bed. “Fine Dirk.”

Dirk perked up. “‘Fine Dirk’ as in ‘get back on the couch’? Or ‘fine Dirk’ as in ‘get back on the bed?’ 

“Get back up here before I change my mind!” 

He’d won. 

To tell the truth Dirk had been winning this fight more often than not. He launched himself from his spot on the floor onto the bed. Sadly he didn’t stay there for long. Dirk bounced on the mattress then bounced off in a tumble of gangly limbs. “Ahhhhh!” 

“Dirk! Dirk are you ok?” Todd looked over the bed, eyes wide. 

“I’m fine Todd. Think I might have bruised something though…” 

“In that case I’m going to sleep.” Todd turned over and wrapped the blanket around him in a tight cocoon. 

Dirk slowly extricated himself from the floor. He was smart enough to get his blanket from the couch before slowly and carefully lying down on Todd’s bed. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow. 

*

Dirk woke with a start. Something was happening, something big. That’s when he heard it. “Todd! Todd what’s going on?” Frantically Dirk went to his friend’s aid. 

Todd was screaming. Todd kept screaming. 

“Todd tell me what’s wrong? If you don’t tell me I’ll have to call an ambulance!” 

Todd was scratching at his chest. Hard. Hard enough that Dirk saw him draw blood. Todd was still screaming. He fell off the bed and started rolling around on the floor. Writhing in pain, but from what? 

Dirk started to think. He’d seen this before, but not on Todd. Amanda. Amanda was sick, her attacks looked just like this one. “Oh Todd.” Dirk whispered. How had this happened? Todd didn’t have Pararibulitis!? 

He started looking around. He pulled open the bedside table, kitchen cabinets, he checked the medicine cupboard in the kitchen. Nothing. Not even a pill left behind by Amanda. 

Just then Todd spoke. “Jeans!” It was loud, almost more of a cry than an actual word, but Dirk understood. He found Todd’s jeans on the floor and soon found a small bottle with brightly coloured pills inside. 

Take 2 pills when necessary  
Do not exceed 6 pills per day

Dirk somehow opened the cap (the universe helped with that one) and pulled out two. He then was able to get them into Todd’s mouth where they were somehow swallowed (again probably the universe). 

There were a few more agonizing moments. Had it worked? Would Todd be alright? God, he hoped Todd would be alright! Then Todd started breathing normally. 

Dirk dropped to his knees and took the shorter man in his arms. 

“I’m sorry.” Todd’s mouth was dry, his lips almost cracked from the strain. 

“What happened?” 

“I was on fire.” 

“You could have told me you know. I would have understood. I could have helped you sooner!” 

“I’m sorry.” Todd cut in still breathing heavily. “Dirk, no one knows yet. Not Farah, not even Amanda. You’re the only one who knows.” 

Dirk couldn’t take it anymore, the emotion, the shock and overwhelming stimuli. He broke.

Todd reached up a hand, placing it tentatively on DIrk’s cheek. 

“Don’t scare me like that!” He said between sobs. He didn’t want to lose Todd. He couldn’t lose Todd. “I thought you were dying! I thought the universe wanted me to be alone again!” He couldn’t say any more, he just couldn’t. Dirk Gently was a very intense person, eccentric and enthusiastic, now almost all built into sorrow and fear. He could feel it, what it was like before. 

“I’m right here. I’m sorry.” Todd said gently. He pulled himself upright and pulled Dirk’s head into his shoulder. “I’m right here.” He reassured. 

Somehow in the dark abyss that surrounded Dirk and his thoughts he heard it. Todd was still there. Soon the sobs subsided into hiccups. 

Todd ‘shushed’ him quietly. “I’m ok. I’m here. We’re safe.” 

Dirk looked up at Todd, eyes glazed with tears, hair disheveled. “I love you.” 

Todd froze.


	2. Chapter 2

Dirk looked up at Todd. He wasn’t saying anything. Why wasn’t he saying anything!? Dirk felt a tightening in his chest. His breath was catching in his throat. His eyes were blurry. Why were they blurry?! What was going on? Why wasn’t Todd saying anything?! 

Todd didn’t even move. He just held Dirk. Held him close. Didn’t let him go. Todd couldn’t tell if he was holding Dirk because he didn’t want to let him go, or he couldn’t. Both, maybe it was both. He couldn’t do this. He was Todd and he had Pararibulitis and he was selfish and…. And…. and… 

“Please, Todd, say something.” Tears were running freely down Dirk’s cheeks. 

Todd swallowed, “I can’t… I just can’t.” He looked away. “You’re nice and good.” 

Dirk perked up a bit, wiping tears away from his eyes. 

“I’m not… I’m not a good person Dirk. I…”

“I don’t care Todd! I’ve thought about this… about you. You’re not a bad person Todd.” 

“You don’t get it!” Todd was frantic. “I’m going to hurt you.” 

“You won’t…” 

“But I will,” Todd lowered his eyes to look straight into Dirk’s. “I’ve hurt everyone I’ve ever loved. Amanda, my parents… that just scratches the surface. I’ve done some really bad things...” 

Dirk interrupted Todd with a kiss. It was soft, barely a brush, a question. He could feel his heartbeat. Could Todd feel his pulse? He pulled away, recentering himself in the process. Then his eyes went wide. He’d just kissed Todd. He’d just KISSED Todd. What did he just do!? Todd’s going to hate him! Todd’s going to leave! Todd’s going to…. And then something happened. 

Todd kissed him and Dirk was kissing him back. Todd’s lips tasted wonderful, and slightly like mint toothpaste which was nice. He moved his hands up and wrapped them around Todd’s neck, playing with his hair. He’d always loved Todd’s hair.

Todd pulled away and Dirk made a sad noise of disapproval. “This is a mistake… Dirk…” 

Dirk kissed him again. It seemed to work last time, but Todd pulled away again. 

“Are you sure about this? I need you to be sure about this,” Todd’s voice was catching, his breath heavy on Dirk’s neck. “I want this, I’ve wanted this… I…” 

Dirk kissed him again in answer, and Todd wrapped his arms around the thin gangly man. It was sloppy and unpracticed. It was obvious to Todd that Dirk didn’t get out much, but he’d never been kissed this passionately. Dirk was giving him everything he had. All of Dirk was his to hold. 

Todd could feel himself wanting more and more with each passing moment. Through the fog of lust there was a thought, “want to move this to the bed?”

“Yes.” 

It was better than anything Dirk could have hoped for. They fell on the bed together. Dirk on his back, pinned down by Todd body. Todd was everywhere. Todd’s light kisses peppering his skin, Todd’s hands pulling his shirt up, Todd grinding into down on him. Dirk gasped and gripped his lover tightly. 

He wanted more, he needed more! Dirk started at Todd’s pants, before being stopped. 

“You first.” Todd’s voice was breathless and dominating. 

Dirk had no choice but to comply as the other man unbuttoned his jeans, pulling them down along with his underwear. He barely had time to adjust before Todd was removing his shirt. Dirk was completely bare held down by Todd’s body. 

“You’re beautiful.” 

Dirk was blushing heavily. Cock standing to attention and rubbing slightly on Todd’s stomach. He bucked his hips up and moaned. He opened his eyes to see a smile that sent shivers down his spine. 

Todd was still completely clothed, but his face was anything but decent. Kissing Dirk possessively, he moved down until Dirk’s fingers were curled in his hair. Todd inhaled deeply before taking Dirk in his mouth. 

Dirk cried out, arching his back in ecstasy. He tried to breathe through it. Just breathe, just breathe. The feeling was overwhelming and wonderful. “Todd!” He couldn’t hold back, “Todd I’m…” 

Todd hummed and swallowed around Dirks swollen member. 

Dirk couldn’t take it and he came hard. His body was arched, eyes wide, hands clenched on the bed sheets for dear life. 

Todd kept his mouth on Dirk, moaning through the other man’s orgasm. Swallowing as Dirk came down from his climax. He pulled off, and Dirk pulled him close. 

“How was that?” Todd asked a bit nervous. It’d been awhile since he’d been down on anyone. 

“Perfect…” Dirk was mumbling. After the breakdown and several interruptions in sleep, he was about ready to pass out. “You… about… you….?” He was struggling to push the words out. 

Todd kissed his forehead. “It’s alright, I’m ok.” Todd closed his eyes and held Dirk close, pressing kisses into the other’s neck. 

Dirk snuggled in closer as they both fell asleep together.


End file.
